I have a cat – a Kello cat

A big, fat, orange, flabby tabby that jiggles like Jell-o

Kello’s a lovable ol’ man of a cat

Bonded to my baby, he lets her do what she will

Flip him, flop him, throw him, and cuddle him so tight he nearly goes splat

Kello pretends he’s a stuffed animal all for her pleasure

He’s sweet and clean and nearly a perfect pet

Kello has just one flaw

He’s a stoner cat and this is no joke

If there is cat nip to be had, Kello must have it and have it right now

I tell you the truth, this sly little guy is dumber than dirt unless there is nip to be found

The stash he uncovers is wrapped up in baggies

But he scratches and gnaws and he works without rest until he gets to his prize

Then he chews it and snorts it and rolls all around in that pile of nip

This silly boy gets higher than high

He rolls on his back, paws straight in the air, eyes kinda glassy

And I can't help but wonder if he’s dreaming of HoHo’s, Ring-Dings, and Doritos, too