Mia Culpa

Mia Culpa

I have wanted to post this apology for a long time. Now I feel I also have to apologize for letting this go on so long, but I hope you will forgive me for that, too... life has been truly insane! I was out of town for a funeral. The day after I got home, I had to leave again for a business trip. And there have been some other major family health issues going on. But I'm here now and I intend to both apologize and explain myself!

In reviewing my entry on Strong Women and the comments that were left... I realized that I inadvertently displayed the very same prejudice that angered me. I never intended to imply that nurses aren't strong women (or men for that matter!) I have spent a lot of time in hospitals -- both for myself but mostly in caring for family. I have often found the nurses to be the most helpful, caring, and strong people there are.

The emphatic nature of my feelings was fueled by two things: 1) The assumption that jobs are defined by gender (i.e., it's a girl so she has to be a nurse or vise versa it's a boy so he has to be the doctor.) and 2) Barbie fatigue. I am do overwhelmed by Barbie, Bratz, My Scene, Disney Princesses that I could just spit!

Frankly, I have no one to blame but myself for this Barbie Fatigue. You see, when I was child I wanted everything Barbie. By my parents weren't very well off so I had one genuine Barbie and two knock-off dolls. All my Barbie clothes were hand made by my grandmother. Now I think that's a wonderful treasure that I cherish. I cherish this to the point that I don't allow my daughter to even know they exist for fear of their destruction. But as a child I was teased because my clothes were homemade and not store bought. Even though I loved my Barbie clothes as a child, I had to pretend that I didn't when others were around.

So, I wanted to fulfill my inner most Barbie dreams with my daughter. I'm not the kind of person that would force-feed my child something she wasn't interested in. When I was pregnant I started to emotionally prepare myself for the fact that she might not like Barbie. But at the same time, every day I would rub my belly and chant, "Please love Barbie! Please love Barbie!"

Alas, I think I rubbed my belly and chanted too many times.

But back to my post... I never intended to leave anyone with the feeling that one career is better than the other or requires more strength than another. I was just too quick on the gut reaction without thinking about my words.

Please forgive me.